Almost two months had passed and I had written nothing on my blog. It was disastrous.
This is the first one, ending the procrastination of the last sixty days.
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| Dried Trees Owe Their Separate Enchantress. (Pic - by R. Suresh Bhardwaj. At Safdarganj tomb on Wednesday, Aug 9, 2023.) |
It was the beginning of a dead sign. It was sign of losing the inventiveness. It was an apathetic situation towards writing. It is said if one lacks interest in writing, one loses one’s creativity, personification and visualisation.
And, it happened with me due to the prevailing procrastination that totally detached me from writing because of not reading creative writing due to the unruly management of hours.
The reason behind this improper management, I find, was the same procrastination caused by a job that created a repeating circle which has been killing my vision. Although it gives me a way to live, but it also snatches many things from me. It imposes limitations on me even after I follow its nature that also ties my legs to go straight and compels to circumambulate. It has no end, it starts again and again with the end of its first rap that accelerates the unduly phase of procrastination. It, actually, is not fault of job, the fault is the un-management of time.
So, it does not matter in which organisation you work, it matters how you spend your 8 hours out of those 16 hours excluding the sleep hour in a day. It is not extravagant to say that a job shapes one’s life. Hence, it becomes need of the hour to develop the instinct to go hand-in-hand with any work profile because any stuff at work place is able to hamper anyone. It should be managed, specially in context of time, i.e. time management. It is the first reality: Unable to be disciplined leads to the willingness to quit the job but the circumstance in which we live does not allow us to quit. So, be disciplined and do things systematically.
At this point, a long surviving idealism ends. Realism starts raising its head. It also starts guiding people to get over others. Sometimes, it is done by justifiable means and some other times by unjustifiable means. When it is not justifiable, even after we do it, we face another reality. Encountering it, many of us go with the second one and get benefitted from unethical and unanswered actions. We should not forget that by this way, we can earn money, not respect. So we ought always to prefer the first one i.e. justifiable means because it not only makes a better way and approach to live but also enhances the admiration to its optimality.
The third one is little different. It starts when apparently young blood has been running in our body. We keep running for hours, days, and year after years for a particular dream. After some time, we realise that it was the wrong track which was being used to run. When we know the fact, our young blood gets maturity and starts turning to be old. Then, we change our track and we find that we are miles back from others who have already started their race years ago. It is worrisome in many cases for us. But, it does not mean that one who has started their race earlier will always win the race because History has been witnessing that the taken time to reach at ten after starting the race from zero has been different for everyone because there is no equal playing ground.
In my case, it holds a contrasting view. Don’t worry, I am not going to tell the tales of that except saying I have passed many springs of my life in solitude in a wish of a dreamy career. But, as of now the time has become over. And, in this case, I always remember Piyush Mishra’s poetry, the bread have overlapped the moon (dream).
“इक बगल में चाँद होगा, इक बगल में रोटियाँ
इक बगल में नींद होगी, इक बगल में लोरियाँ
हम चाँद पे रोटी की चादर डाल कर सो जाएँगे
और नींद से कह देंगे लोरी कल सुनाने आएँगे”
Satirically, someone says to me when I was planning to go to ‘Vipassana’, a meditation camp guided by Buddhist principles, that “one had to go to ‘Lbsnaa’, the training centre for candidates who have passed the UPSC’s civil services exam, but one is going to ‘Vipassana’.
I laughed on his taunt remembering I am ‘Aquarius’. Because, Aquarius is different and he is bound not to give up. He fights till end like the Kunwar Narayan’s poetry.
दुर्गम वनों और ऊँचे पर्वतों को जीतते हुए
जब तुम अंतिम ऊँचाई को भी जीत लोगे—
जब तुम्हें लगेगा कि कोई अंतर नहीं बचा अब
तुममें और उन पत्थरों की कठोरता में
जिन्हें तुमने जीता है—
जब तुम अपने मस्तक पर बर्फ़ का पहला तूफ़ान झेलोगे
और काँपोगे नहीं—
तब तुम पाओगे कि कोई फ़र्क़ नहीं
सब कुछ जीत लेने में
और अंत तक हिम्मत न हारने में।
(Having conquered the inaccessible woods and high mountains, when we'd vanquish even the pinnacle, and believe that there is no difference at all in us and in the hardness of conquered stones.
When we encounter the first snowstorm on our head and will not quiver, then we'll realise that there's no contrast between in winning the all and in not giving up until we reach.)
mood - 🥰🥰🥰
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